Month One Post-Op

DAY 14 (TWO WEEKS POST-OP & FIRST TING FOLLOW-UP)

By two weeks I was able to walk around on my own, though slowly. I could go up and down the stairs and shower on my own as well. I had my first followup appointment back down in New York City that week and met with one of Dr. Ting's surgical team members. He inspected the surgery site to see the healing process and checked inside the vagina. Everybody was quite impressed with the rate of my recovery, especially considering the infection I also just had. I had concerns about why the clitoris was black, however he stated it was just a scab. The doctor asked me if I had an orgasm yet. The question had confused me, because I was like, "What?! I'm only two weeks post-op, I'm not touching shit." He recommended I begin stimulating the clitoris to help calm the sensitivity, getting it used to feeling. The neo-clitoris is definitely very very sensitive, but I'm not comfortable with the idea of messing with anything yet. By about the end of the second week, I was able to drive my car again, but short distances. I was able to get around the house better, up and down stairs, cook my own food. Though, much of my time was still spent in bed. I wasn't supposed to strain myself or over-exert myself. No exercise. No lifting anything heavier than five pounds. Bleeding during dilation was minimal and dilation was nearly painless. It was more uncomfortable going in, as the angle of inserting is odd, requiring it to slide under and around the pelvic bone. This can be quite uncomfortable, but once fully inserted, the dilating is fairly painless. I'd rate it a 0 to 2. In between going to the bathroom and getting food, I laid in bed and played video games or watched TV and movies on Netflix and Hulu. I've begun notice an issue with urination that I hoped would improve with time. I do no pee in a straight stream, but instead the urine sprays all over. I currently fold up a wad of toilet paper to hold in front to block the spray from getting everywhere. I'm not sure if this is the result of swelling, scabs or something else, but I hope it improves.

DAY 21 (THREE WEEKS POST-OP)

During the third week, I was fairly close to being back to normal. I could get around the house easily and even drive my car to do basic errands like picking up prescriptions or fast food. Dilation was becoming pretty quick, painless and no more blood. Twice a day for 30 minutes each. The MetroGel ran out and I switched to using KY jelly for dilation. During my first followup appointment, I was told to should start to stimulate the clitoris to help the nerves get used to sensation. The area was very sensitive, almost too much. By the beginning of the third week, the scabs were shedding off. The scabs on and around the clit had come off too. Urination spray continues to be a problem. On day 21, I felt comfortable enough with my healing progress to try stimulating the neo-clitoris as recommended. There were still sutures in place, I could feel them. I wasn't sure if I should go that far, but I decided to try to go for an orgasm. Essentially, the neo-clitoris is constructed out of part of what was the glans of the penis, the head, tip, whatever. I had never really been able to ejaculate through stimulating only the head of my penis, so trying this was a challenge. After an hour of masturbating only externally on the clitoris, I orgasmed. New sensation... it didn't feel the same as my old ejaculation. It was like cumming but without the pulsing/pumping the penis normally does, a muscular pulsing necessary to squirt out semen from the testicles. None of that was there anymore. No more testicles, no more tubes, no more penis, no more erectile tissue. It was weird and new but still good. Then I noticed the best part: normally after cumming, I'd get this sudden sensation in my body of exhaustion, as if everything just wants to shut off. It's a chemical released into the male body after ejaculating called prolactin. It makes you sleepy. No sleepy though. No tiredness. No shut off. I hated that. I previously suffered from hypersensitivity and premature ejaculation, so whenever I had sex, even if there was no stimulation of my penis, it would just blast off and ruin sex for me anyway. Not anymore. I orgasmed and felt just fine, as if I could have just kept going. But that was enough, I'm still healing and shouldn't mess around too much. I was still very happy to achieve a clitoral orgasm. I had heard from many people over the years myths that post-op transsexuals cannot orgasm. Bullllshiiit. For the next 3 to 6 months, I'm not allowed to have vaginal sex, so that will have to wait, but at least I know I can get off via the clitoris until then.

DAY 22 (INFECTION FOLLOW-UP APPOINTMENT)

On Day 22 post-op, I had to return to New York City for a followup appointment with the infectious disease doctor to checkup on my recovery from the cellulitis infection. I was not confident in my ability to drive for long distances, but that day I had no choice but to drive myself after the person who was going to drive me ended up being unavailable. At only three weeks post-op, I was able to drive four hours round-trip into and out of the city, by myself. My cellulitis infection was defeated. One of the symptoms of the infection was a hard, tense lower abdomen. To the touch when pushing down, it felt as if I was tensing my abdominal muscles. They said it will take more time for my lower abdomen to recover and loosen up, but the infection is gone. The hot compresses help with this and I continued to use them. I returned home without incident. I honestly had no idea how well my recovery from surgery would go. During my efforts to research SRS and hear stories from other transwomen who underwent the procedure, I had mixed experiences about what recovery would be like. One told me I'd be barely able to walk around for a month. Others said they were up and about in two weeks. Either Dr. Ting is an SRS master or I'm just naturally awesome at recovering from a major surgery. Lone roadtrips at three weeks is impressive I'd think. I dilated when I got home. No blood. No pain. Slipped in, 30 minutes later slipped out. Awesomeness. The drainage site they left unsutured had begun to finally show signs of healing. It will take time for the wounds there to seal closed, and I'll probably have a bit larger scarring as a result. I'm not happy about it and just hoped for the best.

DAY 25 (PERITONEAL GRAFT UPDATE)

Today I had two new experiences. In the morning I woke up and used the bathroom. I had been using gauze smeared in bacitracin overnight to help protect the drainage site wounds struggling to heal on the lower left labia. I had noticed that the gauze over-time would become moist with a fluid of some sort. When I peeled off the gauze to pee, a small amount of clear fluid plopped out of my vagina into the toilet. The peritoneal tissue is now producing peritoneal fluids... it's producing natural lubrication. Good to know the graft is actually working. However, I'm concerned I may require continued use of pads or something else to help absorb the fluids throughout the day and night to prevent my underwear from getting covered in it instead. At this point I am no longer bleeding at all, even after dilation. Because I am no longer bleeding and my only concern is some peritoneal fluid leakage, I've switched to using panty liners rather than full size pads. Way more comfy. My sutures have begun to dissolve and fall out as well. I carefully removed some strays that were sticking out around the exterior of the vaginal opening and from the underside of the clitoris and near the urethra. I hope the rest in those spots can be removed soon. The prickly tied-off ends occasionally poke sensitive parts.

28 DAYS LATER (FOUR WEEKS POST-OP)(ONE MONTH)

Four weeks after surgery, life feels mostly back to normal. Sutures continue to come out as they dissolve. Still no more bleeding. The drainage site wounds are finally healing, some spots are finally healed or sealed over. Swelling and soreness are almost completely gone. There is some sore sensitivity in both labias if pushed on. Urination is still a problem however. When I use the bathroom to pee, it still sprays all over and I have to use a plastic scoop thing I found in my kitchen to try to block the spray and send it down into the toilet instead of everywhere. The scabs have all shedded off. Dilation is going well. There is still a bit of discomfort if I try to sit up, placing pressure onto the surgery site, so I still need to either lounge or use something to sit on to keep pressure off. I'm walking entirely normally and walking is a lot better without larger menstrual pads. The panty liners have been working out just fine since I switched to them. The abdominal hardness from my cellulitis infection has softened almost back to normal, though I still feel some tightness in the area if I stretch.

DAY 29 (SECOND TING FOLLOW-UP)

I returned to New York City for another follow-up appointment with Dr. Ting. As of now, I am to start dilating three times a day for 20 to 30 minutes each, instead of twice a day. I was also told I am allowed to lift up to 20 pounds of weight, instead of no more than five pounds. The urination spray problem is common and normal, caused by swelling around the urethra. Within another month, I should be peeing normally instead of spraying a mess. I was told I am still not allowed to engage in any bottom sex, that includes receiving anal, for at least another month. I was never a fan of it anyway though. I'm also allowed to drink alcohol again. Healing is apparently going very well. They scheduled me to return for a third follow-up appointment a month from now (Day 60). Tomorrow is one month post-op. I'm very happy with how things are going. I tried masturbating again, clitoris stimulation only, but this time using a vibrator. I was able to reach orgasm within ten minutes rather than an hour like doing it the first time with just fingers. The orgasm was more intense this time and fluid leaked out. My prostate still works it seems.